Duncan Dirk and Elliot Royce in... The Play's the Thing
From UTRPG
This short novel stars the Century Club's ill-fated smooth-talking magician, Elliot Royce, and the two-fisted down-and-dirty sleuth Duncan Dirk. When Royce invites Dirk to the opening show of the 12th Street Theatre Company's production of Hamlet, they don't suspect that they will become embroiled in a mystery involving spooky noises, ominous gangsters and an incurable fatal disease!
Contents |
[edit] Act I: The Rain Check
[edit] Scene 1: A friend in need
Louis Rosselet, one of Elliot Royce's actor friends, gives Royce two tickets to the opening night of the Twelfth Street Theatre Company's production of Hamlet, in New York. As Royce has few friends, and many of those are in the hospital following their trip to British Honduras, the only person he can think of to bring is Duncan Dirk, who comes along reluctantly cheerfully. Nobody is surprised when Dirk manages to find trouble before even arriving at their destination, when he accosts four large men in an alley shaking down a fifth not-so-large man for money. When they pull out guns Dirk beats a hasty retreat, and when he comes back with reinforcements they are gone.
Further problems arise when Royce and Dirk get to the front of the theatre. Someone is making an announcement that the show is cancelled for the night. Someone darts out from the theatre -- Royce's friend Louis -- and drags Royce inside, with Dirk on his heels. He insists that they take the place of two of their actors who have fallen ill. Royce is to stand in for Bruno Fontaine, in the role of Horatio, while Dirk is to take the place of Annie Lamont, who plays Ophelia.
Wait... Ophelia?
Desperate times call for desperate measures, Rosselet and the other actors insist. Both Fontaine and Lamont contracted a mysterious disease earlier in the day, and both are incapacitated. Their only chance of putting on a successful show is for Royce and Dirk to fill out their roster. Finally the two agree to learn their parts and put on the show the next night. The cast and crew all chip in to help them with the blocking, costumes, lines and other aspects of the show. They stay at the theatre until 2 AM practicing.
[edit] Scene 2: A mysterious illness
Royce is running lines with the airy and pretentious Edward Bond, playing Guildenstern, when Bond tells him that shortly before each actor fell ill there was the same strange series of events: the air went cold, despite the hot July weather, a chill breeze passed through the halls, and a thrumming sound emanated from the basement, as though there were something wrong with the boiler. Then, within an hour, Annie Lamont started showing symptoms: red pustules on her face and neck. Before long she was bedridden, unable to even sit, and periodically emitting the most spine-chilling gasps and coughs. Later that day the company was trying to figure out what to do about the missing part of Ophelia when the chill arose again, as well as the humming sound. An hour later, Bruno Fontaine was showing the same symptoms.
Meanwhile, Duncan Dirk runs into the actor playing Claudius, the whiny and weaselly Fitzgerald "Fitz" Montgomery, and realizes he is the same man he saw getting harassed in the alley earlier. He leans on Fitz, and finds out that he borrowed 300$ from the Gambini family, and now they've raised it to 400$, claiming the increase is due to "interest". What's more, most of the company owes the Gambinis money -- Annie and Bruno certainly did. Fitz is terrified at the idea that the Gambinis might somehow be infecting debtors with this disease.
The actors spend the next few hours running lines and blocking with their new recruits. Finally it is 2 in the morning and everyone is exhausted, so people get ready to leave. Just then the doctor arrives. Elliot Royce offers to show him to where the patients are. The doctor examines them carefully and is perplexed by their symptoms. He says that their condition resembles nothing quite so much as the Tasmanian Whooping-Pox, a rare and deadly disease. Fortunately it does not seem to be communicable, but he has yet to hear of a case of someone surviving the terrible affliction. As thanks for his efforts, rather than pay the doctor the $20 he is owed, Royce cold-cocks him and leaves him in the alley.
[edit] Act 2: Tasmanian Whooping-Pox
(cont'd)
